Blackened old banana peels, egg shells, used coffee grounds, moldy grapes and dried-up orange skins. The diet of champions. Loaded with antioxidants and nutrition, and guaranteed to make the body healthier. And so appealing to the eye. Just makes you drool at the very thought of loading your plate, right?

Well, ummm. Most people – not so much.

“Are you crazy?!” Ask any teen if they want a heaping helping of this delightfully healthy food, and you will most likely get blasted with their particular version of that statement, along with a disgusted roll of their eyes. Can’t blame ‘em. If you were to hand me a snack of any of those things, my own answer wouldn’t be much sweeter.

But take a look at this garbage from another point of view. Ants will notify the queen of their colony, “Hey, Your Highness, we just came across a whole smorgasbord of really good stuff! You want us to form a line to begin transporting it all back to your storage bins?” That army of ants will cart away every tiny crumb that is loose. (And given a chance, they will remove your entire pantry.)

They don’t view our garbage leftovers as trash, but as a real treasure trove. Because, the truth is, that garbage is healthy stuff! Put it in a blender with water and puree the fire out of that mess until you have a disgusting brown liquid. Mix it into your garden soil, where you are going to plant your vegetables. Then later on, watch your plants stand and salute you for having the forethought to give them some of the nutrition they need to grow big and healthy – before they were even planted.

Same thing happens with us humans. What we know as painful events in our lives – things we view as horrible garbage - is the very things that our Creator and Maintainer is using to feed us and grow us into mature, useful adults. But just like if we were handed a plate of unedible food, our reaction to the bad things that happen is usually, “Are you crazy?!! This is horrible stuff! I hate what’s happening, and this can’t be good for me.”

But those among us who are gardeners know what a good dose of ugly, organic food can do for a growing young plant. And so does God. You might just call Him the Master Gardener, who knows exactly what each of us needs in our life to make us grow up emotionally. He is very aware that a steady diet of ‘the good life’ will make us self-centered, undependable, and immature. So, out comes the Creator’s blender to create a hodgepodge of the needed heartaches that makes us more like Him in the end.

Loving, mature and caring.

I don’t care for the taste of that awful liquid He doles out any more than you. But it does do the job.

Beware of forcing your mate to compete

The young man’s bride of a whole six months waltzed dramatically into the den to show off her new outfit. But engrossed in the college football game of his alma mater, he never took his eyes off the screen. Slightly miffed, she moved in front of the tv to force him to notice her. Unfortunately, at the precise second she chose to make her move, his quarterback launched a 30-yard pass that hopefully would tie the game. He let out a frustrated bellow, and certainly not really thinking of consequences, young husband brusquely told her to move aside so he could at least see the replay.

Needless to say, the first argument of their young marriage began. Hours, and buckets of tears later, she finally admitted her fear, “You obviously love football more than you love me!” Honest Abe thought a few seconds, and then made a fatal mistake when he blurted, “Well, honey, I love you a lot more than basketball.”

That night a little smarter Abe got well acquainted with the guest bedroom.

Sometimes priorities can get a little off-center. The pleasure you get from that hobby can easily derail your common sense, and make you totally ignore what you know…that your loved one is more important than your hobby.

Be very wary if you find yourself pouring your time, or money, or even affection into what started out as a harmless pastime, but can end up as a hairy problem. If it makes your loved one feel neglected and abandoned, you got a hairy problem Social media, sports, outdoor activities, and friends are all a good thing, if kept where they belong…. below your spouse on your list of ‘I Want To Do This.’ Otherwise, you are running the risk of damaging the very relationship that started out as Priority Uno.

Hobbies and side activities are a great thing, as long as they are just that – side stuff. Never let them become so important to you that your mate begins to feel jealous or abandoned. You are inviting consequences down the line that you are not going to enjoy. Because, rare is the loved one who simply takes that kind of abuse quietly. Maybe not in a knockdown drag-out, they may be passive-aggressive in showing you their hurt feelings, but sooner or later those feelings will make their presence known.

Need some passive-aggressive examples? Mate starts looking for sly ways to hurt you. Bowling shirt got misplaced…hmmm, wonder how that happened? Spouse quits talking to you – or anything else. Money suddenly disappearing at a previously unknown rate into the pockets of local department stores. What used to be admiration and honor deteriorates into sniping and griping. Or some other irritating behavior that you will notice in your relationship.

Realize, analyze, and be ready to apologize. Talk it out and compromise. You don’t have to totally give up your hobby, you just need to put it in its proper place.